Charlie Stella is a veteran of crime fiction. He wrote novels such as Johnny Porno, Jimmy Bench-Press, Shakedown and many others. He was nice enough to stop by today and share his ten rules to write noir. He lives in New Jersey, where he write his deliciously demented pieces of violence.
1) I doubt I’m a noir writer (traditionally speaking) but since noir’s literary roots in the US seem to emanate from hardboiled writing, I can add my two cents. So, rule number one: Make it hardboiled.
2) Hardboiled = no holds barred. Whether it has to do with a limbless protagonist (Smith’s Lydia in Psychosomatic), Bruen’s Jack Taylor getting to the room a split second too late (the kid has just gone out the window), Zeltserman’s remorseless Killer or Stella’s Jimmy Mangino using the edge of a table top to remove the teeth of a female bar owner, there are no holds barred. Everything goes, nothing should ever be in check, including the title of the book(s) ... try reading Johnny Porno on the subway and enjoy the looks you’ll get.
3) I used to believe hardboiled had broken away from private investigators, journalists and the like, but I’m recently reading a terrific novel by Declan Burke (my first Burke, Eight Ball Boogie, it won’t be my last) and it’s official, I’ve changed my mind. Terrific writing is terrific writing, no matter what the protagonist does (or is supposed to do) for a living. Research Consultants rock.
4) The formula needs a nasty broad ... ah, I mean woman/female. This is a personal preference so don’t bring it to the bank, but a nasty female that not only has a sharp tongue, she can be a twisted SOB as well. Maybe one that would call her ex-husband to fake a kidnapping of her own child so the guy leaves whatever he’s doing at the time (collecting money) unattended and gets robbed (her idea).
5) History is always cool ... use some historical facts ... or go the Craig McDonald route and put the entire show in historical terms/figures. His Lassiter series swims in historical Noir that lets us hear some key literary (and otherwise celebrity) figures speak their minds. Contemporary novels get a plus from this reader when they deal with some genuine Americana (somebody say Ellroy?) ...
6) Surprise us ... not just with who did it, but how or why they did it. Patricia Highsmith’s The Talented Mr. Ripley remains one of my favorites of all time and I can point to the specific point where I felt that way (when Tom clubs Dickie Greenleaf to death with an oar) ... then taking on his identity was another brilliant surprise. Highsmith was no slouch. Apparently a true to life bitch in real life, she was one of the greatest crime writers (noir, hardboiled, psychological thrillers or otherwise) ever.
7) Humor helps ... don’t depend on it, but feel free to throw in some genuine humor IN CHARACTER (i.e., the character(s) putting forth the humor don’t necessarily realize they are being funny). Malapropisms worked well for me in Shakedown (i.e., “To get down to brass taxes,” as the phrase-twisting enforcer Tommy Agro puts it.)
8) Somebody (hopefully a woman) has to wear garter belts ... well, not really, but I’m a big fan of the things. Old Vampire movies are so much more sexy than the new soft porn on HBO and the like. Remove the sex and leave the women in garters for Christ’s sake. Oh, noir, right ... garters can’t hurt hardboiled and/or noir either ...
9) Sex sells ... and when it’s done right, it will intrigue both sides of the gender aisle and nobody does it better than the Queen of Noir, Vickie Hendricks. Her first (Miami Purity) and latest (Cruel Poetry) are two powerful novels with powerful women who know how to handle themselves in all ways instinctive and otherwise.
10) Read, baby read ... there’s no substitute for it. Read whatever you like, but reading is an essential to writing that cannot be ignored. There’s just no better way to learn how to write than to read.